First, when a horde of malevolent Martians and their awesome killer robot come to Earth to kidnap St. Nick for their own children's enjoyment, the results are unintentionally hilarious in "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians." See alien guns that look like Wham-mo Air Blasters! See a drunken Santa! And best of all, see Pia Zadora in her film debut as a Martian child! Next, a gang of gold thieves think they're safe once they've reached their mountain hideout, unaware that they're being stalked by the cobweb-covered "Beast from Haunted Cave." Roger Corman's brother, Gene, served as producer for this frightfest; Monte Hellman directs. 161 min. total. Standard; Soundtrack: English Dolby Digital stereo; Subtitles: English (SDH); featurettes.